A real blog entry.

Last Thursday my ice cream scoop was due. We had to make 3-d replicas of some normal household objects/tools. They assigned us either a vice grip, sewing shears, or ice cream scoop. For some reason, the class refers to them all as tools even though an ice cream scoop is technically a kitchen utensil. Anyway I got there late, only by a couple of minutes though. I had just finished the project right before class, and it wasn't thee greatest of 3-d paper sculptures, but I was proud to have finished it, and I thought it was okay considering the rules were no glue or tape, and I opted not to go with sewing, because I think it's like cheating, considering the other materials you can't use. I was watching all the other kids in my class get criticized for their work, and it seemed unfair, because they had some really good work. I hope that the teachers were just being so critical in order to broaden our minds and our choices for more creative work, and not just telling us what to do to make it "better." If they're just being mean... STOP STEPPING ON MY CREATIVITY, it's hard enough trying to be original and creative without you badgering me.

So anyway, we weren't just graded on our 3-d paper objects, but also the template pieces that we used in making them and what creative composition we could come up with to put them on paper. I hadn't put a lot of extra thought into my composition, because I had only left time to concentrate on the object. None the less, I had one and I waited until they almost got done critiquing all the projects to put mine up. As I was about to hang my own up, I realized how straight and perpendicular everyonelse's compositions were. It just so happened that most of my composition was along two sides of the paper and I thought that it would be interesting to hang it diagonally with those two sides at the bottom so that the bottom of the paper had a lot of visual weight (quite the dramatic effect). But that's not why I really did it, I just didn't want to normal for some reason, I kind of wanted to reject the system. The primary reason I hung it up diagonally was simply because I knew that they would ask why I did it, and I wanted them to ask, I wanted to be thought provoking (you know, raise some questions, mix it up a little). When they did ask, and I told them that, they did NOT like it, they told me that doing something just so that people will ask is not a reason for doing something, and not an answer to their question. They were so worried about it, they didn't even talk about my composition. In short, they ripped me apart... big time. After they got done ripping on me, they just moved right on to my ice cream scoop with out mentioning anything about my composition. I felt victimized. I felt like I might almost be ready to cry. But not nearly as much as I did when we saw Seventh Day Slumber at Wartburg. That time, I did.

This week though, I get to redo the project to my teacher's liking for a better grade. I don't know why she's being so generous, but I thank her greatly. We also have to do another project where we use pieces from our template (at least 30) to make an new 3-d object, an abstract container of space. For those of you thinking tupperware when I say container of space... no! It just means that it takes up space and contains it. In fact, the idea is that it not look recognizable, so it would be bad if it looked anything like tupperware.

This weekend, Jessica called me, but I wasn't there to recieve the call, and that makes me really sad. You can't even imagine how much I miss her right now.... and all the time.

Today I went to Target with Jake and Sam, my future roommates. I got a new pair of jeans, and that is so exciting. Other than that, we walked around looking for snacks and oogling at electronics, while I held Sam back from buying anything ridiculous or unnecessary as that is what he had instructed me to do before hand. We also found a crazy awesome smelling green apple candle which was addicting and I wanted to eat it... that's how good it smelled. I wanted to buy it just so I could hold it up to my nose and smell it every once in a while. It was soooo good.

Going shopping reminds me though... of how broke I am. I need to get a job or something. Maybe I can try to give plasma like my roommate. Maybe I can withstand it and not nearly die again like the last time I gave blood (warning: this is a dramatization, not to be taken seriously and I did not really nearly die). Maybe I won't just about pass out right after they start to take my blood. It's not something I do consciously, I am perfectly fine with needles being in me and with seeing blood or even losing it, just for some reason my body rejects the idea of losing so much blood in a controlled environment and makes me feel sick therefore not allowing me to continue. The lady at the blood center, where I live, told me that I should not even try giving blood for at least three years, it's been at least two (I think).

Lately, I have been having all these self actualizing thoughts, like I'm trying to figure out why I am the way I am and why I do the things I do, and where I fit into the big picture. I wish I could remember some of them to put down right now, I have so many of them that I don't take the time to write them down. There would be a lot, and if I was able to let you know some of them, you would see how frustrating it is since most of them contradict each other. I can't figure myself out. I'll work on trying to write some of them down.

One thing interesting about this post is the time at which it was posted, you see, my weekends get mighty screwed up, I stay up really late and sleep in through a bunch of the day. Tonight I ended up being tired from last night and I fell asleep at about 7:00 PM, but I apparently didn't need that much sleep because I couldn't help but waking up again at Midnight, and couldn't get back to bed so I decided to post an entry.